I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
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