Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
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