no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
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