Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
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