Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
Randomize
