Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
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