I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
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