it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
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