Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
