fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
