After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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