There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Randomize
