i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Randomize
