tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
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