oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize
