So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
