bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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