you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
