Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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