p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
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