I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Randomize