He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
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She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
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I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day