I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
Randomize
