So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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