Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
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i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
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