It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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