i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize