thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Randomize
