His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
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