Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
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