He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
