Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(914): View more from New York

oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.

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(678): View more from Georgia

Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.

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(503): View more from Oregon

He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.

(1-503): View more from Oregon

Marry him

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(760): View more from California

my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...

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(614): View more from Ohio

worst night to have a conscience

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(601): View more from Mississippi

I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.

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(585): View more from New York

She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back

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(315): View more from New York

The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.

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(936): View more from Texas

Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.

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