bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Randomize