Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
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