My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
