They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
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