One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
He uses pillows to masturbate.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
