I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize
