You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
Randomize
