I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
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the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
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There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
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