no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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