True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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