# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Randomize
