NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
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