she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
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