handjob tips. give me some.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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