At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
She even gives head with a lisp.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
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I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
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Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.