if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Randomize