Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Randomize
