she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
Randomize