don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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