How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
Girls should come with a carfax report
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
